1
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BEAVIS AND BUTT-HEAD

2
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OLD BEAVIS AND BUTT-HEAD
IN "CARDIAC ARREST"

3
00:00:19,838 --> 00:00:23,041
Butt-Head, can I put
the bags in that basket?

4
00:00:23,508 --> 00:00:24,776
No.

5
00:00:25,210 --> 00:00:27,712
The basket is
for my personal items.

6
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Of course, I had forgotten.

7
00:00:34,085 --> 00:00:35,854
I almost fell.

8
00:00:37,088 --> 00:00:40,058
Good. Come on.

9
00:00:47,866 --> 00:00:49,568
Hurry up, Butt-Head. Come on.

10
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Wait.

11
00:00:51,236 --> 00:00:53,505
I have to rest a little.

12
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There are many stairs today.

13
00:00:58,944 --> 00:01:00,712
Damn, Butt-Head,
I always have to wait for you

14
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on the stairs
because you are fat.

15
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Shut up, Beavis.

16
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It made me very tired
ride the scooter.

17
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Damn, Butt-Head.
Move, you useless fat man.

18
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Come on!

19
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Well, well.

20
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See?
It wasn't that terrible.

21
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Oh!

22
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What's happening?

23
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My chest hurts.

24
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I can't breathe.

25
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Brilliant.

26
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My left arm fell asleep.

27
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Do you know what you should do?

28
00:01:55,133 --> 00:01:56,635
You should whip the monkey.

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It will be as if I did
another person.

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Clear.

31
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Good idea.

32
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Can't.

33
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That sucks.

34
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It would have been good.

35
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Beavis, stupid,
It's cardiac arrest.

36
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A cardiac arrest?

37
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Alright.

38
00:02:20,759 --> 00:02:23,028
Damn, Beavis,
go get help or something,

39
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Because, if not, I'm going to die.

40
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Sure, it's fine. I'm coming.
Don't worry, Butt-Head.

41
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Everything will be fine.

42
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Sorry, sorry, Butt-Head.
It was in reverse.

43
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Well, now it is.

44
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Again in reverse.

45
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Classic Beavis.

46
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I'm going to die.

47
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Wrong side.

48
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I think it's around here.

49
00:03:08,273 --> 00:03:09,607
Yeah!

50
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Yes, let's go!

51
00:03:11,776 --> 00:03:14,179
- Yes.
- Yes!

52
00:03:22,220 --> 00:03:25,991
- Why were we doing that?
- Don't know.

53
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I don't give a damn...!

54
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<i>I care
Damn!</i>

55
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Your claims!

56
00:03:38,269 --> 00:03:40,739
I didn't understand.
Do you give a damn about what?

57
00:03:40,872 --> 00:03:44,242
I don't know, "your anus"
or something like that.

58
00:03:44,676 --> 00:03:47,879
No, I think he said
something like...

59
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It doesn't matter.

60
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This is the best letter
that I couldn't understand.

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<i>You are face down
In a ditch

62
00:03:59,824 --> 00:04:01,860
we would have to go
to one of these recitals

63
00:04:01,993 --> 00:04:05,063
and crawl on the ground
and eat dirt.

64
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Yes. And the music
It must be very, very strong.

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I already hear badly,
It is better for me to go to the end.

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That's how it is.
Finish the job.

67
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That? What do I speak too low?

68
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This video transports me
to simpler times.

69
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When we could sit
on the couch and look at these things.

70
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No worries.

71
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Yes, that was life.

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Now I have to go
to the Unemployment Office,

73
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I have to go look
my benefits card...

74
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Like an adult.

75
00:04:50,775 --> 00:04:53,711
Is it a full suitcase
of scrambled eggs?

76
00:04:54,345 --> 00:04:55,914
Yes, yes.

77
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scrambled eggs
They are the most metal form

78
00:05:00,318 --> 00:05:01,786
of cooking eggs.

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00:05:01,953 --> 00:05:03,955
Yes, yes.
And if someone says:

80
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"I want the eggs
with the runny yolk, please",

81
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"I don't give a damn
your liquid yolk!

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Your eggs will be scrambled
by Lamb of God!"

83
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All those people
who stabs himself

84
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He has white privilege.

85
00:05:29,347 --> 00:05:31,249
Of course, who do they give
the knives first?

86
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What a surprise.
To white people.

87
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"White people."

88
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Well I have to save
to Butt-Head.

89
00:05:45,897 --> 00:05:47,966
I have to find someone
that can help.

90
00:05:50,034 --> 00:05:51,870
someone who can
help Butt-Head.

91
00:05:55,940 --> 00:05:57,475
I need a doctor now!

92
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Have you already seen it
Doctor Jasper?

93
00:06:01,079 --> 00:06:03,882
Yes, yes.
When I was about eight years old.

94
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Well, sit back and complete
these forms.

95
00:06:08,386 --> 00:06:11,055
Alright. Thank you. Brilliant.

96
00:06:12,123 --> 00:06:13,858
Don't worry, Butt-Head.

97
00:06:13,992 --> 00:06:16,127
I will write as quickly as possible
that can

98
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My God!
Sir, are you okay?

99
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Is there anything I can do?

100
00:06:30,275 --> 00:06:31,543
Yes.

101
00:06:32,377 --> 00:06:36,447
There is something you can do.

102
00:06:37,015 --> 00:06:39,050
That? What can I do?

103
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- Do it to me.
- Disgusting!

104
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I don't understand this book.
What happened to the caterpillar?

105
00:06:53,064 --> 00:06:54,933
Where did this butterfly come from?

106
00:06:55,500 --> 00:06:57,969
See? That's why I don't read.

107
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Mr. Beavis, come with me.

108
00:07:00,505 --> 00:07:03,041
At last.
I'm going to save Butt-Head.

109
00:07:04,375 --> 00:07:06,177
Well, how did you
sense lately?

110
00:07:06,311 --> 00:07:07,912
Pretty good I guess.

111
00:07:08,046 --> 00:07:10,281
Although it bothers me
a toenail

112
00:07:10,582 --> 00:07:13,418
And last week,
my finger was swollen

113
00:07:13,551 --> 00:07:15,620
and fat and disgusting.

114
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Wait. swollen,
fat and disgusting...

115
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I came here because my
roommate,

116
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Butt-Head, you need help.

117
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And what would be your problem?

118
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He's fat and doesn't feel well.

119
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can't even
whip the monkey.

120
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And boy did he try.

121
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It's so sad.

122
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Well, if your friend has
overweight, could be

123
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a high risk of suffering from
cardiac arrest or stroke.

124
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Spill.

125
00:07:45,250 --> 00:07:47,318
It no longer spills anything,
if you understand me.

126
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You must make sure
that you eat well

127
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and exercise.

128
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Sure, I understand.
Well.

129
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Thank you for your visit.

130
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Butt-Head, Butt-Head.

131
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I came to save you.

132
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The doctor said
that you had to eat well.

133
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I mean, all the hamburgers
with cheese as you can.

134
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No.

135
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Your life is in danger,
Butt-Head.

136
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you have to eat
cheeseburgers.

137
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Come on.

138
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If you finish them,
I'll give you fries.

139
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I mean, I bought them for myself,
but it's okay.

140
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And the doctor also said
that you have to exercise.

141
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That?

142
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Come on. Right now, Butt-Head,
get up

143
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Come on. Jumping jacks.
Come on. Thoroughly.

144
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That's why you're having
a cardiac arrest, for being lazy.

145
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Come on, stop. Yes.

146
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"Stopped."

147
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Butt-Head, now
ends with a turn

148
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around the block.
Come on.

149
00:09:03,628 --> 00:09:04,729
No.

150
00:09:06,230 --> 00:09:07,999
I think it will be fine.

151
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That boy is a fighter.

152
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A neighbor called
for a medical emergency.

153
00:09:15,473 --> 00:09:18,309
It's all right, sir.
We already solved it.

154
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It didn't end
the cheeseburger.

155
00:09:24,716 --> 00:09:27,151
More for me. Yes.

156
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Beavis, you earned it.